Fiction Packet

"Survivors"

Going through the fiction packet I was immediately taken by the first story, Survivors. With just under 300 words and no names this story spoke volumes. I love the way it was written. From the first line "he and his lover were down to their last T cells and arguing over who was going to die first." Just from that line you know its about two gay men diagnosed with HIV. Yet the words gay and HIV never appear in the sentence. this story was full of emotion you felt empathy as a reader the characters experienced anger, disappointment, selflessness, love and  pride all in this short story.

I can't quite say what it was that attracted me to this story. it just feels real, you can imagine this situation and these people, their struggles, and their love. we hear a lot about people being bullied, harassed, beaten "out of their gayness" so or me this story was very relevant and rings true. there was also a sadness about this story however which you felt in the story and definitely affected your mood as a reader. But as much as it was about death it was also about love and to me that was the bigger theme in the story.

Language that stood out for me in this particular piece was:

• "he knew, too, that they all--father, mother, two older brothers--would disapprove of their flat, of the portrait of the two of them holding hands that a friend had painted and which hung over the bed, the Gay Freedom Day poster in the bathroom, all the absurd little knickknacks like the windup penis......"

This sentence which came a few sentences after the first made it clear that they were dealing with disapproving families but also described the place that they referred to as home. But also how it ended with:

• "....Dear God, he thought, let me die first, don't let me survive him."

I just think this sentence just showed how selfless someone can be but also makes you think what would be going through your mind if you were faced with this same situation. would you be scared? would you be at peace? would you think of the people in your life? aboout your spouse? i just think this story was brilliantly written.

BIRD BY BIRD

I am super excited about this book, no offense intended, but this book is everything I thought this class was.. when I registered for it. I’m eager to read more it’s witty and informative at the same time.

Shitty first drafts!!!!!

YES! YES! YES!

This chapter has offered me some much needed relief. In the midst of writing my own novel and I am just over it. My thoughts are all over the place I feel like stopping, going back, making changes but I am now at peace.  On page 21 he summed me up effortlessly “people tend to look at successful writers…..and think they sit down at their desks….hat they take in a few deep breaths, push back their sleeves…and dive in, typing fully formed passages as fast as a court reporter” (Lamott, A).  I was so overwhelmed with not being able to pour out chapter after chapter that I got frustrated and wanted to give out. But peace came when I read that all good writers write shitty firsts drafts and its how they end up with good second drafts.  This has motivated me to continue writing and not fret over my “shitty first draft.”

Polaroid’s

I like this chapter it starts with “writing a first draft is very much like watching a Polaroid develop. You can’t—and in fact, you’re not supposed to –know exactly what the picture is going to look like until it has finished developing.  Going into my novel I had a clear pathway my characters were to take but within the first few pages the character created their own paths and I the story directed itself. I stopped trying to reign myself in. and even though the conclusion will ultimately be the same how my character gets there is shaping itself.

School lunches?

I found to be very random…plan to reread.

City Eclogue

The Open

 I choose this partucular poem becasue reading it aloud in class made it make more sense to me so i wanted to share my thoughts on what his poem meant to me.

The spacing looked like chaos and had no order which i think was a visual representation of his theme which was Jim Crow laws, civil rights and 1950's 1960's southern america. the line that says black pillar of light is in refernce to MLK and Malcolm X's assasinations.. they represented hope for black people and their deaths was like that dream going up in smoke for their followers and their respective movements. The line that says "a people within a people" like we're all of a human race but we're seperate as if we are not all one. people dont even realize how similar they are becasue in one neighborhood its like two different planets.



 I almost feel like the poem is saying their deaths represented no hope when you go back and it talks about things being plowed down and nothing being put in its place its like there was no new leader to rise up and keep that movement alive.

I THINK THE ENTIRE BOOK IS UNIQUE IN HOW IT LOOKS VISUALLY, THERE IS A LOT OF SPACING, LINES, GAPS, INDENTS, HYPHENS, SEMI-COLONS. WHICH ALLLOWS FOR A CERTAIN AUTOMATIC RYTHM WHEN YOU SAY THE POEMS ALOUD. I DONT QUITE UNDERSTAND EVERTYTHING HE WRITES.

YOU SORTA HAVE TO READ IT OVER AND OVER LINE BY LINE TO KINDA UNDERSTAND, EAC POEM FEELS LIKE IT IS SERIOUS IN NATURE MAYBE EVEN TAKING A STANCE BUT IM NOT CERTAIN BECAUSE ITS HARD TO FIGURE OUT, THERE'S A VOICE ALSO LIKE A NARATIVE IN SOME OF THE POEMS LIKE THE POEM PSALM WHERE IT SEEMED LIKE A STORY.

BUT ALSO HIS LANGUAGE IS VERY VISUAL YOU CAN EITHER SEE WHAT HE IS SAYING OR EASILY IMAGINE. FOR EXAMPLE 'THE RISEN NIGHT SWEAT UP...A PACING FOG OF NIGHTMARE...DRIES AWAKING TO WAKING.'

SO EVEN THOUGH ITS DIFFICULT ITS SORTA LIKE USING CONTEXT CLUES WHERE  YOU FIGURE OUT THE MEANING BASED ON WHATS AROUND THE WORD.